We have all seen the Wizard of Oz and remember the scene when Toto pulled back the curtain revealing instead of The Great Oz, a man who was pulling levers. This short scene from this classic film is to a greater or lesser extent all of us. We live our lives behind our curtain. It
From working with couple’s for over 30 years some disturbing trends have evolved that appear like a train wreck in the making. When couples go off the rails being right by one or both partner is usually somewhere in the mix. Being right is a roadblock, it cuts off communication and causes the process to
Jake came to my office with fear in his eyes. What was getting himself into? Not unusual, so I start by soothing his hesitations and helping him to see that it’s a process that starts by building trust and I must be trustworthy. I cajoled him with how anxiety-producing it must be to spill your
“Shame is the most powerful master emotion. It’s the fear that we’re not good enough.” Brene Brown. The challenge for Jake was to unravel his shame cycle, not only to ease his personal pain but to neutralize the toxic nature of it so his anxiety and depression could be alleviated. We started with self-criticism because
Biology explains why men stray, but reason and affection hold the keys to happy, monogamous marriages between women and men. It is necessary to the happiness of men that he be mentally faithful to himself. Infidelity does not consist in believing or disbelieving it consists in professing to believing what he does not believe.” Thomas
The liar’s punishment is not in the least that he is not believed, but that he cannot believe anyone else. -George Bernard Shaw Where did this spate of liars and lying begin? Perhaps with the Stone Age but in our current climate it appears that the truth and lies are so blurred that we cannot
“Happiness is nothing more than good health and a bad memory.” -Albert Schweitzer “The moments of happiness we enjoy take us by surprise. It’s not that we seize them, but that they seize us.” -Ashley Montigue “You will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of, you will never live
“When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on”. – Franklin Roosevelt The news is not what it used to be, remember the little things like war, disasters and overall bad news. Those were the good old days. Now we have a new tragic frenetic display of serious insanity
Do you have trouble completing tasks on time? Are you afraid to try new things because you are afraid to fail at them? Are you self critical and a perfectionist? Do you use the word should and what if a lot? If you answered “yes” to these questions then you need to read further. We
It’s 5:30 AM and I am awakened by the swift moving thud of paws walking over my body to get to my side. Jake is purring like a ’57 Chevy on steroids. As he thumps down next to me with his back up against my stomach, I instantly know what he is up to. He