Ben and Nancy were at home one evening when something happened that shook them up. This was not the first time either. The weekend had gone well, they cooked dinner together, danced, talked, made love and were in excellent spirits as Sunday evening rolled around. Nancy was (in her mind) kidding him in her usual
When I am working with couples, the men may talk a lot about wanting to be appreciated and having a partner who can help them; they seem to want loyalty and they want to engage in activities like hiking or biking, or they want women to be at their side on their journey through life
To be happy together, we need to build and maintain loving connections with our partner. The stronger these connections are, the more lasting our love will be. Love and romance are nurtured as much by small, everyday things as by grand gestures—and sometimes more so. A patient recently explained to me that he had taken
We have all seen the Wizard of Oz and remember the scene when Toto pulled back the curtain revealing instead of The Great Oz, a man who was pulling levers. This short scene from this classic film is to a greater or lesser extent all of us. We live our lives behind our curtain. It
From working with couple’s for over 30 years some disturbing trends have evolved that appear like a train wreck in the making. When couples go off the rails being right by one or both partner is usually somewhere in the mix. Being right is a roadblock, it cuts off communication and causes the process to
After being married for over 30 years, what seems apparent to me is that it’s not so much what we can see about what is going on between us but what we cannot. My wife asks me to do something and I snap at her. Why? I try to tell her something that is important to
We pan in on a newly married couple gazing lovingly at each other on the dance floor dressed in white and aglow with happiness and sweet expectation for a life together. They read their vows professing love sublime with misty-eyed friends and family looking on. It’s a happy time for all, maybe one of the
My wife of 26 years and I were making dinner the other night and between shifts of chopping and mixing I was waxing philosophical about what women want. So, naturally I sort of put the question to her in my typically male off-handed way, so what is it that woman want? The answer was not
Candlelit dinners. Champagne. Diamonds. Roses. Imported Chocolates.
NOTE TO MEN: If you haven’t planned or purchased something from this list, you’re likely going to have a horrible night this Feb. 14th (and one without any lovemaking). Why? Blame it on romantic fantasy. It starts long before our first Valentine’s purchase or our first kiss. We’ve heard “happily-ever-after” fairy tales since kindergarten. We’ve grown up viewing “diamonds-are-forever” commercials.
As adults, we experience the commercialization of Valentine’s Day as a day of great expectations, and just as often, great disappointments when our beloved’s gift-giving (or lack thereof) doesn’t support our romantic dreams.
Imagine the scene: a newly married couple floating down the aisle all decked out in wedding attire, gushing with love and happiness as they glide effortlessly toward what appears to be a brilliant future. Her dress is gorgeous, and he is quite dashing in his tux. They appear to be (on this day) the perfect